exhausted

6 Jan

i feel so exhausted after trying to make friends with people… I’m trying to but i’m wondering when will i ever get a community here or fit in. Will it be within my one year left as a youth intern? I should join the many different cells to see i suppose but because of all the changes that happen to them year after year their real groups only come out during service and lunch and not during tribe. I could force my members to eat lunch with me but seeing that they have their own groups I dont really want to force them to. Trying to integrate into this everchanging system is not something that i enjoy. All the different groups and different people is hard. All the different cliques that are separated during tribe so it means that for new people its very hard to fit in. 

I know that while I am right where I am suppose to be, I am wondering what am I suppose to do here. God???? help?????

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